I have a goddaughter. And this weekend is her 9th birthday. So there will be a birthday party. I asked her mom for some ideas for a gift. She wanted Justin Bieber and some guy names Scott or Steve or S something that I'd never heard of.
That's the name. It's a guy. He was all over Toys R Us. But I got there and I called because she'd mentioned Hannah Montana. And there was a VIP one about 8 inches and an 11 inch Barbie size. I couldn't remember which Hannah she had said was still needed. It was the Barbie size. And I got a set of outfits for the doll and grabbed Taylor Swift as well.
Now my point is, Miley Ray Cyrus is a pretty young woman.
This doll is not.
The chin's all wrong. The nose is too small. Everything that could be wrong is.
And it reminded me of the Bionic Woman doll. I got that from one of my aunts. It was her doll and she passed it on.
Now you could roll up the right arm's skin and see bionic components -- one in the lower arm, one in the upper.
She had two components in the legs too -- one in each quad.
But she was an ugly doll.
Lindsay Wagner is an attractive woman.
The Bionic Woman should have been a great doll. But they made her face so wide. Especially for the body.
Now I hadn't seen the show and I played Bionic Woman all the time. Then it started airing on the local independent (this is syndication) and I was honestly scared and asked what was wrong with Lindsey Wagner's face. It looked like it had been in a vice.
Because I was used to the thick rectangle of the doll. They reallyh did a lousy job on Lindsay's face.
And the hair?
It was awful. Barbie hair tends to last. The Bionic Woman hair looked like it was burned. (It wasn't burned.)
So I started thinking about that doll and all the other dolls I had that didn't look a thing like the people they were supposed to be.
This is C.I.'s "Iraq snapshot:"